Mortal Kombat has stretched the boundaries of its signature graphic Fatalities over the last twenty years. In addition to an ever-growing fidelity of gruesomeness, sequels introduced us to Brutalities, Babalities, Animalities, and most recently Quitalities. It makes me wonder…what proposed finishers never made it out of the pitch stage? Here are five completely made up Fatality variations I’m pretty sure we’re never going to see.
The match begins. Sub-Zero rears back, his muscles bulging with tension, and slams his bare-knuckled fist forward into Liu Kang’s mouth. Teeth loosen, bone snaps, and shards of jaw rupture into the soft tissue around them, shattering veins and rupturing blood vessels. The impact bruises Liu’s brain and he slumps to the ground, smashing his cheek into the pavement as his voluntary motor functions fail. Sub-Zero stands waiting for Kang to rise, but he doesn’t, because in real life that’s what happens when a ninja punches you squarely in the face.
Rejected Because: Reality is not fun.
After decades of oppression from colonial overlords, the citizens of Outworld come together in a loose confederacy of affiliated states fighting for common liberties. Battling long winters, starvation, factionalism, and the most powerful professional army in the world, the alliance of ninjas, cyborgs, and weird four-armed people persevere and triumph. Despite being outnumbered and outgunned, they overcome their enemies with the help of the French, then sit down together to forge a document which will become a template for freedom of fictional inter-dimensional martial artists for all time.
Rejected Because: Nothing even remotely like that could ever actually happen.
“What are we even fighting about?” Scorpion asks Sub Zero after half a round of brutal bone snapping and X-Rays. “I mean, this is no way to resolve a conflict.” Sub-Zero looks up suspiciously at his ancient rival. “We’ve done this, what, hundreds of times? How often have I burned you to ashes? How many days have you ripped my spine out? What’s the point of it all?”
The two fighters look one another in the eye across the blasted hellscape.
“We could try talking for once,” Scorpion appeals, holding out his claw. Sub-Zero looks back. After years of conflict, the cause of their ancient vendetta is almost lost to his memory. Surely there must be a better way.
The pair agree to settle their differences peacefully. After an hour of thoughtful discourse, they shake hands and head down to the local ice cream parlor to share a sundae.
Rejected Because: Kills the possibility for a sequel.
Erron Black draws both pistols and fired twice into the chest of Cassie Cage, then raises his barrel and takes off part of her skull with another blast of lead. The victorious player moves to select “Rematch,” but the option has disappeared. Returning to the main menu, he finds her portrait removed from the selection screen. That’s the price of a Mortality finisher, where shooting your foe with a gun results in a logical conclusion: the character is dead and stays dead.
Rejected Because: Even with DLC fighters you’d run out of opponents really fast, leaving your lonely avatar standing in a jungle just sort of staring and waiting for someone to show up.
This one is just never, ever going to happen. The dismemberment, disembowelment, immolation, shattering, vivisection, melting, and cannibalistic consumption of sentient beings is fine under an “M” rating, but depicting the physical act of love is right out.
Rejected Because: Sex is bad.
What bizarre Mortal Kombat finishers can you think up? Let us know in the comments below! We’ll be collecting the best into a reader reaction article!
Jared Petty is a Senior Editor at IGN. He finishes his foes with a stern glance. Please follow him @pettycommajared on Twitter.